Wednesday, October 14, 2009
A Summary Thus Far
I promised that I would write something after the whole ordeal was over. Well, for now it is at least. Didnt / Couldnt really believe it until i signed the offer letter yesterday, making everything official. So yes, I do have a new job now. OSK's operations associate program which is gonna be starting next month in November. What date in November? Why dont u clever little boys and girls take a guess? Guess wrong u die. =P
I wont deny i was really happy the day i got the offer. It felt a world was lifted off my shoulders..kinda. But for better or worse, i am always a realistic person and try to be as honest as i can with myself. And honestly, there are parts that i wish this job didnt come with. Bond is one thing of course..no one likes to be bonded, but i can accept that. I just wish OSK could be next to a monorail station at least! Up till now i still havnt figured out a mode of transport that will cost me less than 6 bucks a day (by public transport). It looks like parking alone in the area costs around 12 bucks a day. Factor in tolls and petrol and whatever else, and though i maintain my same pay cheque, theres def gonna be higher expenses with this job. =(
And last of all..maybe im just unhappy over still being in the banking sector. As dom put it : "its ironic how you always want to get out of banking and now youre back in it again", and i couldnt agree more. But as the wise old saying goes, beggars cannot be choosers, and I really am grateful and thankful to God for putting an end to months of distress and uncertainty which Literally felt like eternity. I AM looking forward to the whole thing, although i predict a very VERY steep learning curve owing to 0 real experience in any kind of office work. Just be prepared for many more rants to come..except maybe in a different vein. =/
But ANYWAY, my whole plan after finding my next job after PB was to give a whole summary of all the interviews i have been for ever since day 1 of looking for a job before and after PB. Lets not count all the emails and applications i have made on jobstreet; over the last 7-8 months i have clicked 'apply' on jobstreet roughly 60 times, and sent around 20-30 emails directly to companies about jobs. Here i just wanna talk about the interviews i actually went for, and through it all you will see how i started from a total Noob to jobhunting, slowly gaining experience along the way. I only hope i can help anyone i can, so that others wont have to go through the same painful learning experiences as i did. =)
By now my memory is kinda hazy, coz i nvr expected to make this post after so long since my very first interview. But ill try my best to rmb. This whole story is gonna take a few posts to complete anyway, such is the detail that i can provide..lol. I def cant rmb which interview came first in some instances, but ill try my best..hehe
*to be continued......................*
{~ Plant Another Tree
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Thursday, August 27, 2009
Just Kill Me Lah
I am so drained.
Another rejection today. Boo hoo hoo.
No big deal you say? Try again? There'll be better ones coming along? Be patient / it takes time?
Whatever it is, ive heard it all before. You'd be surprised how quickly you can hear every consoling phrase after 3 months of continued rejection. I've already lost count of the number of times..there might be close to 20 by now...im not even sure anymore.
What is going on with me? Everything just isnt going my way the last few months. I havnt done well at work, ive failed at practically every real potential interview ive been for, and worst of all, i cant even go a few days without causing hurt to my loved ones. I can hardly tell you what ive been doing this last few weeks coz honestly i dont even want to remember it...all i can care about is just getting another day and another week over with, and screw everything else.
I dont even eat properly anymore. Me, the one who never turned down food or was unable to finish all good food on the table, suddenly cant finish my own portion of fish n chips or chicken chop. Its not all the time la..usually i can still plough through 2 bowls of rice and what not, but then there are times when theres just no appetite for food...and a few mouthfuls of whatever im eating later im full and dont wanna take in anymore.
Its probably the eating less and irregular times which is giving me gastric which is giving me crazy stomach aches. But whatever la. i dont care.
I even lose sleep!! I never thought I would have problems sleeping, let alone wake up before an alarm clock set at 715. Well guess what..its happened. no matter if i sleep at 12 or 1..by 5 or 6 i can be wide awake. Its not a good feeling either...I might feel rested then, but by the middle of the day its a struggle just to keep my eyes open. The worst was a week or two ago..but its not so bad now. But then again who knows..with the latest rejection itll prob come back again la. Ah but whatever. who cares about a little bit of lost sleep anyway.
This isnt a cry for help, coz who can help me apart from God at this point? Whos going to be able to tell me why all this is happening, and why is it not ending even though im putting all my effort into this? I want answers, but whos gonna give me the exact ones? Certainly not you, not me, not anyone on this great earth.
2 months ago I said i was going through the biggest test of my life. Well guess what? 2 months later, its not any better. In fact its worse. But then ive come to a realization. Things dont get me down so much anymore. Its like ive learned to cope slightly now...build an imaginary wall around my core emotions, so to speak. Thats not to say im totally unaffected..or else u would never see another emo post like this. But its not a happy kind of coping...more like all the pain and frustration and anger and worry and doubts and fears and confusion and sadness and tears and pity and all that other negative energy has taken so much from me that i dont feel it anymore. Its like..say you sat on your hand. At first there might be some pain, but then as the blood flow is stopped, what happens? It starts to lose feeling and become numb. Well that about sums it up right now la. The hand just gets more numb and numb..and either im gonna stand up and all the blood is gonna rush back to it with a huge case of pins n needles later or the whole damn thing will just drop off and die.
Screw it la. i dont want to waste my time getting all emo about this. If im doomed to have a majority of my life like this, so be it. Im sure there must be so many more people worse off than me anyway, so who am i to complain? im getting exactly what i deserve arent i...so why dont i just go sit in a corner and watch the world pass me by la.
{~ Plant Another Tree
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Tuesday, August 11, 2009
2nd Attempt!
I apologize for lack of updates. The number of posts I am making these days is kind of like the sales achievements at public bank - Way Below Expectations. hahahaha
Anyway...its come to a point where i really dont wanna blog anymore until a really significant change happens..otherwise im just going to be repeating the same old drab stories and ranting bout the same old things. Im tired of all that la. Repeating it over and over again doesnt help. Solve one problem and another immediately takes its place. Maybe when it all stops...IF it stops...ill let u know.
My girlfriend turned 21 on the weekend though! Certainly turned out to be a very memorable occasion although she kept insisting she didnt want a big party =P. I would normally go into much greater detail, but she said she doesnt want me to fill in the blanks of what happened that night, so I will spare her the details. Sorry guys..hehe.
All I'll say is...it was a good dinner at Summer Palace(?) and a good night at Opiumm @ Jaya One. I managed to find all the right presents..so even though my budget is busted this month, it was all worth it. =D
She's gone away to Ipoh for her next assignment already...and Im missing her all the time..=(
But enough of that. Im sure the rest of u dont wanna see all the mushy stuff here..hahaha. Just wanna update one other thing, and that is.............
MY TWITTER ACCOUNT GOT SUSPENDED!!!!
How? I sent a spam tweet. Who did it? I dunno. It wasnt me. I didnt log into twitter from a Friday and when i went back in on Monday it was already suspended..so ive lost all my hard-earned followers!! T.T
Nvm..I'll start again!! I now have another new twitter account...come follow me at
@adams2ndaccount !!!! =D
{~ Plant Another Tree
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Wendy
